Pregnancy Series: The First Trimester

RRbaby

Mid-last year I had a vivid, symbolic dream in which I was standing in the middle of a highway that stretched into the horizon, and when I looked down, in my arms was a baby boy.

The details of that dream stayed with me in a way so few do — so real I can still transport myself there in an instant. A little soul was circling. That I could feel, just as I could feel the subtle shifts occurring within in me, opening up new possibilities and considerations and energies I’d dabbled with previously but never fully embraced.

Something was coming.

Fast forward several months…

And there were a series of signs and messages, delivered in quick succession.

Alex sent me an email out of the blue saying ‘I know you’re not supposed to ask these things, but do you have a little miracle growing in your belly?’

The same day, I went to a kundalini yoga class with Tara and the meditation for the evening centred on the divine mother, which felt meaningful and significant to acknowledge in the way that things do when your wisest self whispers ‘There’s something in this, you know.’

Beyond the external nudges, I was also acutely aware that I was a couple of days late to start my cycle and there was a feeling that was bubbling inside me that sat somewhere between hope and holy shit…


Retreating to the bathroom, Ramai in the next room tapping away on the computer, I’d just taken the all-important pee-on-a-stick test — the one with ‘No other test tells your sooner!’ emblazoned across the front — and I found myself willing those little lines to darken. And darken they did.

P O S I T I V E.

Oh my goodness, I yelled around the corner.

I think we’re having a baby.

I. Think. We. Are. Having. A. Baby. I’d just said those words, for real.

I looked up and there he was in front of me, pulling me closer, time grinding to a halt for a moment as emotion electrified the air between us. Shock! Joy! Disbelief! Elation! Argh!

Ever the certainty-seekers, we decided that we couldn’t fully believe this was happening until I went to the doctors for a second test, and luck on our side, the receptionist on the other end of the call said ‘We have an appointment… but it’s in 5 minutes. Can you get here?’

You better believe it, I thought as I legged it to the car.


A moment I’ll never forget.

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I was sitting in the waiting room when my phone beeped with a text from Tara. Timing, my love.

In a millisecond, I’d shot back with where I was and what I was doing.

‘What the?… wait… doctor down the road? I’m next door at the post office. I’m coming.’

Not moments later, there she was. Swirling rainbow harem pants. A curtain of blonde hair. Her eyes as wide as saucers as she walked slow-mo towards me, sat down on the seat beside mine and leaned forward.

Babe, she whispered. It was a surreal passage of time where this gorgeous friend of mine seemed to journey right into the depths of my soul and pluck out every thought and emotion I was experiencing, weaving them into something exquisitely pure to reflect back at me.

We hugged and our shoulders shook; sweet tears flowing between a pair of soul sisters who didn’t need a doctor’s test to confirm that a baby was on its way,

We both knew. That little, circling soul had found a home.

Baby MacDonald was headed earth-side.


Are you ever really ready?

I was asked this question not long ago, and want to attempt to answer it here with the caveat that obviously everything I’m sharing is coloured by my own experience, and may vastly differ for you. There’s, of course, no right or wrong answer here.

For me, there was a noticeable, deep maternal yearning and sense of readiness that took up residence in my heart sometime last year.

Ramai and I had always hoped that children would be part of our love story in this lifetime, but we had no definites around when that would, or even could, happen. Nearly all our friends have one or more children, but it still felt like an out there priority for us at that stage; one of many tangled in with (more) travel, business launches, saving to buy a house and so on.

But then, all that shifted.

I found myself talking regularly about when we’d have kids, and this ‘down the track’ dream started to have a year, and even months attached to it.

Instead of looking at other people’s babies with a beaming — but detached — smile, saying ‘What a cutie’ to whoever was with me, I started to feel an unmistakable internal tug. There was a new dialogue unfolding; my body and soul in conversation.

I want to have a baby, I thought.

Hang on, I’d catch myself, I want a baby?

And yep, in there perched amongst flashes of fear and questions of what will happen then?, I found in myself a desire to become a mama that I simply could not deny.

I was as ‘ready’ as I was ever going to be,

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The first trimester notables.

I’m going to do a big ol’ gear (and mood) switch because I want to sum up key elements of my first trimester, and it’s easiest to do that in short form.

Honestly, it feels like there’s so much to share, which I’ll do over subsequent posts, but for now ::

WHAT I CRAVED.

Citrus anything. Crushed ice with fresh lemon juice (praise the preg-gods for our Vitamix-slash-”healthy slushie maker” is all I can say). Also, orange juice. In fact, any juice. We bought a new cold pressed juicer early on, an Oscar Neo, and it’s been the best thing ever.

Carbs. Pasta! Bread! Gimme! I remember one day I saw a recipe in the back of a magazine for a homemade herbed macaroni cheese, and I had to make it. I had absolutely no choice in the matter — all of a sudden, I was at the checkout going ‘But, I’m not even THAT into pasta?’ And like many things I ate in that first trimester, the thought of the meal was at least 57 times more exciting than eating the meal itself. *Sigh.*

Beef burgers. Actually, to make a sweeping generalisation here, ‘boy foods’ on the whole took my fancy (hello cheese and anything savoury).


MY AVERSIONS.

Vegetables. Oh gosh, this one was hard to swallow (literally) — and is actually very common. It was a total brain-bender that the mere thought of my beloved broccoli was enough to make me dry retch.

Logic would say: ‘But I’m growing a spine and a brain — shouldn’t I be craving veggies like MAD right now?’

But, tastebuds would say no. Nooooo.

(Cooking with) coconut oil. The combo of super-sonic pregnant powers of smell and my vegetarian husband cooking kale, broccoli and brussel sprouts in coconut oil was enough to have me covering my head with a pillow and yelling from the bedroom PLEASE STOPPPP! It was comical, believe me, and I was over the moon the day I realised I’d come out the other side of that pesky little vege-and-coco-hating phase. Hallelujah!


SHARING THE NEWS WITH FAMILY (AND BESTIES).

I couldn’t dial my loved ones soon enough after leaving the doctors, and to hear your elation in the jubilant, cracking voices of your nearest and dearest is BEYOND everything.

Recalling my Mum crying ‘That is the best news I’ve ever heard’ on the other end of the phone still makes me misty-eyed.


FULL BODY TIREDNESS, AND FEELING ‘HUNGOVER.’

I can’t really remember the last time I ‘slept in’ — the standard seven and a half to eight hours sleep has always served me beautifully — and I’m not an afternoon napper (the reason being on the very rare occasion I do drift off, I pay for it with being up most of the night).

So, with that in mind, you could say the full body tiredness of particular days in the first trimester knocked me sideways a touch.

I was blessed not to experience morning sickness in the vomiting sense, and truly feel for the poor expectant mamas that do, but I did get to taste the half-to-full day nausea and I’ll liken the feeling to an uncomfortable hangover because:

// You crave heavy/ grounding foods (aka carbs) to settle your stomach.

// You’re not sure whether you want to be asleep or awake. Agitation levels = HIGH.

// You start willing yourself to just throw up dammit so you can release the feeling of discomfort.

// Plus, your energy tends to slip right down the drain, and fast.

Thankfully it was close to Christmas as this was all happening for me so I was winding things down business-wise anyway, and one of the benefits of running your own show is being able to set up with a laptop in bed when absolutely necessary. Hurrah.

The change: At nine weeks, I was thrilled to wake up feeling like my energy had returned with a vengeance. I’d love to say I never felt nauseous again, but unfortunately, pregnancy is steeped in unpredictability so there have definitely been bouts here and there, but significantly less so as the journey has progressed. Double hurrah.


RESEARCHING / GOOGLING…

… And learning pretty quickly that pregnancy forums aren’t my cup of tea. And that’s okay.

While forums can be useful for a quick answer occasionally, you often have to trawl through the muck to get there, so when in doubt, I highly recommend directing your questions to a small handful of people whose opinion you trust, including, of course, your primary care provider.

In addition to this, my favourite pregnancy-related books and resources are:

Bountiful, Beautiful, Blissful by Gurmukh Kaur Khalsa

Buddhism for Mothers by Sarah Napthali 

Ina May’s Guide to Childbirth by Ina May

The Bump baby app (The Bump app was the first one I came across, but there are a heap of different ones out there)

* More to come on the recommendation front.


I HOPE YOU’RE OKAY WITH NEEDLES?

Because you certainly get acquainted with them in pregnancy!

I’ve unfortunately never been able to give blood as we lived in the U.K in the 80’s (mad cow disease) and was told by my parents that I was an O positive blood type… but, turns out I’m actually A negative, which has meant a couple of additional injections of Anti-D throughout my pregnancy for these reasons.

(you’ll also have blood tests for the Down’s Syndrome screening, to test glucose and iron levels, and anything else required along the way.)


BLOATED, BUT NOT SHOWING.

I couldn’t wait to have a bump, but it didn’t noticeably appear until around 22 weeks-ish.

What happens before that is The Bloat. The cocktail of hormones coursing through your body when you’re pregnant slows your digestion amongst many other things, and you can carry this bloated feeling well into your second trimester, which happened for me.

* Here’s probably a good place to mention that I’ve massaged oil (either coconut or jojoba) into my belly and breasts most days throughout my pregnancy and haven’t experienced any stretch marks.

While the jury’s out on whether stretch marks can be ‘prevented,’ I’m all for adding any nurturing rituals that connect you to your body and baby into the mix, purely because they help release a flood of feel-good hormones. I usually have a little chat to our lion cub as my hands swirl (from the bottom of my belly, up towards my heart), and sometimes ask my husband if he can take over instead, which is divine and allows him to ‘connect in’ too.


THE JOY OF THE SECRET.

There’s something incredibly special about having a secret that just an intimate group of friends and family are privy to, and despite the fact that by about 10 weeks we’d started to get more and more ‘lax’ with keeping that secret, I got a serious kick out of the moments where someone would ask when we were planning to start a family.

‘Oh soon, for sure’ was my usual blase response, with a sneaky sideways glance to whoever was positioned near me and in the know, but on the inside, I was chuckling / bellowing ‘Moowahaha, actually there’s a BABY GROWING IN MY BELLY RIGHT NOW!’

The day we did finally share the news publicly after our 12 week scan was one of the most wildly exciting days of my life. The outpouring of love still blows my mind.

Speaking of…


THE FIRST SCAN: 12 WEEKS.

Unforgettable. Magical. Tear-inducing.

And also: bladder buckling.

In the hour before the ultrasound, you’re required to down a bottle of water without going to the bathroom — which sounds like no big deal, but at that stage of the pregnancy where you could pee every five seconds, actually is — and as Ramai and I sat nervously in the waiting room hand-in-hand, I decided I’d ‘be a good girl’ and drink another almost-full bottle.

Please note: this was a mistake.

A trainee was in with our sonographer learning the ropes which meant that our scan went for an exceptionally long time, and coupled with the fact our little one was being cheeky and flipping around (which meant lots of heavy stomach pressing by the technician to get the right view) I was almost hallucinating by the end I needed to go to the bathroom so badly.

Discomfort aside, however, the more important news to convey here is that there is nothing quite like all-encompassing flood of LOVE you’re engulfed by when that first fuzzy white flash appears on the screen in front of you, and you realise you’re looking at your child.

A little beating heart. It suddenly all becomes gloriously real.


Now, over to you ::

I’d LOVE to hear from you in the comments — with insights AND any burning questions you may have. You can also find the second trimester wrap up right here.

And before you go, if you have any pregnant friends/ family members who you think would find this post valuable, go ahead and hit the buttons below to share the love. xo

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83 Comments to “Pregnancy Series: The First Trimester”

  1. I had chills of excitement and joy reading this! Congratulations and thank you for sharing your beautiful, soulful experience of your pregnancy. I cannot wait to read more! My husband and I are definitely feeling the baby pangs and are soaking up as much inspiration from other parents as we can before we get on the baby-making train. One of my new-mama friends gave me Bountiful, Beautiful, Blissful recently and I just love it and I’m not even pregnant yet :). Any other books you recommend? Being the avid researcher and reader that I am, I trust I’ll get a lot from your posts as well as online, but if you have any help for the soon-to-be papas out there (maybe Ramai has some tips?), that would be fantastic too. Thanks, Rach!

    • How exciting Danielle! BBB is such a gorgeous read — I’ve gone back to it several times for comfort and to be reminded of the ‘grander process’ unfolding here.

      I’m going to be honest and say I haven’t gone too nuts with reading. I have a few of the ‘classics’ in my bookshelf (Baby Love springs to mind) that I’l refer to if I feel the need once our little man arrives, and also love Ina May’s Guide to Breastfeeding, but feel it will make more sense once I’m actually in the throes. A lot of the other info I’ve found most useful has been via conversation and blog posts. I’ve been conscious about seeking out positive stories, and also have a deep sense of trust that the right information will find its way to me as I need it.

      Ramai has been reading The Fourth Trimester (which I’ll read as well) and said it’s fantastic, and finally, I’ve also been scribbling notes from the books I’ve read into a journal that we’ll share and continue to add to as time goes on. All the best as you lean into all this! x

  2. Thank you for sharing Rachel! I wondered whether you had any thoughts or advice on dealing with first trimester worries? I am 7 weeks pregnant and I’m a big ball of worry. I am meditating and reminding myself that the statistics are on my side, but I guess having had a loss before I am finding myself wishing away the first trimester, which makes me sad because that’s a third of my pregnancy!! Would love to hear your thoughts x

    • I thought I’d forget to add something in and this was something that I wanted to talk about so I’m really glad you’ve commented with this q, Ann. Thank you, and before I start, CONGRATULATIONS lovely.

      I haven’t experienced a prior loss but I can definitely resonate with the feeling of wanting to hit that ‘safe’ 12 week mark for peace of mind.

      I think this is a really natural part of the process, and what helped for me personally was holding the vision for the pregnancy as a whole (feeling/ seeing/ affirming its safe progression), and also acknowledging any feelings of concern ‘in the moment’ but swiftly steering them back to more high vibe, positive emotions.

      ‘I acknowledge this fear, but understand that it’s just a sensation and is not my current truth. I choose faith instead.’

      Wishing you all the very best for a beautiful, safe pregnancy. xo

  3. Oh Rach, adore this. Our little man joined us on Easter Sunday – 2 weeks early with the full moon. My best tip was affirming trust in my body + babe. Bohdi was born in 3 hours completely chilled as I imagined. It’s a game changer + the most spiritually fulfilling experience ever. Your heart will literally explode in the best way. Big love to you, Ramai & baby Mac. Adventures await! C.x

  4. Such a beautiful post and takes me back to my pregnant days which seem like such a distant memory and my son (love saying that) is only 7 months old. I actually fell pregnant in the same month I birthed my blog whilst doing the Bright Eyed and Blog Hearted course…
    Another good reference, from conception to starting solids and the developmental stages/milestones for bubs is Well Adjusted Babies, I am still referring back to it on a weekly basis. I can relate to so much of this post… THANK YOU for sharing.
    Enjoy the last stages of your pregnancy… such a magical time x

  5. Babe I remember us telling each other about our “visions” in an email and I thought WOW we have no idea how powerful we truly are. Baby Mac has chosen well and I am sending you so much love as the time etches closer to you meeting your little man. xxx

  6. Divine timing Rach! I tried to fall pregnant earlier this year. After about 10 days of ‘am i or arent i’ with false negative tests, found out I was but then miscarried very early. It was a really stressful time and put both me and my husband off trying for a while longer. This last week hubby and I have been talking about whether we want to have kids or not and I have been really future tripping over it.
    I’m putting it in the hands of the universe that it will happen if/when it is supposed to but that warm fuzzy feeling that came from reading about your 12 week scan feels like a pretty big nod from the Universe to me.
    Thanks as always for your beautiful words xx

    • Jodie, I’m so sorry to hear that. I’m sending much love your way.

      And regarding the nod? Not dissimilar to the knowing that I was referring to here:

      “….which felt meaningful and significant to acknowledge in the way that things do when your wisest self whispers ‘There’s something in this, you know.’” x

  7. This sounds like my story with my symptoms haha!!!! I’m just shirt of 12 weeks, and having all the same cravings…. Very into cheese and toasted sandwiches :) please share more as you go along!!!
    ?xxx

  8. This beautiful post sent chills of excitement and joy through my body!
    Thank you for sharing, I loved reading every word. xx

  9. Now at 16 weeks I happily giggled my way through the bloated/cravings/tiredness/aversions as mentioned above! So much of me wanted to have this insanely healthy pregnancy but the first trimester I surrendered to putting my feet up while the dishes lay piled in the sink and eating chocolate for breakfast… it’s better than nothing right?
    Now though, I’m happy to report I’m eating well again and bub and tummy are growing everyday!
    It really is such a magical experience and I loved reading yours.
    Sending you and your family all the love in the world.
    Thanks for sharing Rachel x

  10. I loved so much about this post, but mostly how your body started to tug at you when it was ready to bring a baby into the world. I felt the same when it was Jacks turn to arrive. :) now weeks (or days) away from your birthing experience, I am sending so much love and sisterhood support. For me it was the single most greatest arrived empowering days of my life. I get butterflies (and the odd rib kick!) when I dream of that day arriving again on September 1st with our second baby. Can’t wait to read more posts.

    I also giggled at the coconut oil cooking aversion. Amen! Hehe. But sadly a few stretch marks this time round, managed to escape them round 1.

    • Oh honey, I am SO excited for you and the expansion of your little family.

      Thank GOODNESS the cooking with coconut oil thing passed. It’s one of our most used products!

  11. Welcome back to blogging, Rach! :) This was such a delight to read despite me being in my super early 20’s and the thought of babies are so far, for now hahaha. I loved how you enveloped the whole experience with your positive outlook on life + your usual humor ;) Definitely looking back on this post when my time comes!

    Lotsa hugs,
    Pam x

  12. Congratulations. What a wonderful time in your life. I’m interested to know if, given your intuition, you did a pregnancy test early or if you waited until you missed your first period?
    Cheers,
    J

    • Hey Jax! The intuition that there was ‘something coming’ was one in the background for at least 6 months, and then by the time I really started to feel like I might be pregnant my period was 2 days overdue (from memory). I waited another day or so and then did the pregnancy test.. already having a pretty strong feeling about what the result would be. x

  13. Love this and your outlook on everything! ?????? Thank you for being you and blogging!!

    Im so excited to be pregnant with our first bubba and I was wondering if you could let me know how you deal with people sharing negative experiences of their births, pregnancies or raising children?

    Love and light to you xxx

  14. Hi Rachel – thank you so much for sharing your insights! I am 25 weeks pregnant and am keen to hear about the experiences of others who are a few weeks/months ahead of me. In particular, I would love to hear if you have attended any classes or read any books in preparation for the birth? I have been considering attending calmbirth classes vs the hospital birthing classes and both options seem to be a decent $ and time investment, so I want to ensure whatever I choose is going to serve me well. I would be interested to hear about how you have chosen to prepare and your thinking behind making these decisions. Congratulations on the upcoming arrival of your little man, it is such an exciting time!! xx

  15. Tears. Just, tears! You are a gifted storyteller Rach and you will be (no doubt about it), a glorious, DIVINE Mama Bear to one very lucky little man. Thank you for this xx

  16. Live reading your words again! You have such a beautiful voice!
    I’m 33 weeks pregnant, and I personally found the most difficult part of pregnancy has been losing my sense of who I am. I spent the first 16 weeks (and then some-but it was improving!) so sick, nauseous, vomiting and literally could barely make it off the bed to go to the couch. I couldn’t drink water without vomiting at times, let alone eat healthily or do yoga, or give anything but the barest minimum to any part of my life.
    I’ve realized now I needed to go through that because my life is about to change. I think it was the universes way of stripping away all of the labels I had stuck to my identity-who am j when I’m not a teacher, not doing yoga, when I don’t have a clean home, not x,y,z. Those labels will be stripped away when I become a mother, so it was preparing me for the next stage. That’s how I chose to see it now.
    I’m sure that I still have some huge lessons to come in the next months and years, and that some more identity shifting will also occur. Do you have any tips on dealing with changing identity?
    Best of luck with the coming weeks! Xx

    • I love your awareness and insight on this, Ness. So beautiful.

      I’ve just taken a moment to think about this question from a personal perspective and the (shorter version) answer of what bubbled up for me is that the expressions of me that I relate to and ‘live out’ currently will still BE expressions of who I am — albeit with the essence of the Mother woven in as well. The feeling for me is that rather than things being stripped away… I’m gaining. That means the lessons I learn as a mother will flow into the energy I bring to my business (and so on.)

      This is a BIG topic and one I might dive into more at a later stage, but hoping that sheds a little light for now. x

  17. Awww Rach. So great to read. Funny about the citrus – this time round I ate about 10 mandarins a day in the first trimester :) Citrus and bread was all the rage.

    Can’t wait to see those first pics of your little boy xo

  18. So beautiful, Rach, you have such a gift in your writing, a true reflection of your heart. I burst into tears at ‘That little, circling soul had found a home.’! So divine.
    My kids are grown now, but I vividly remember looking at the ultrasound video (yes, it was that long ago!) when I got home and seeing my daughter’s face so clearly. (I looked back on it several years ago and couldn’t make out that detail at all!)
    Special times, enjoy every moment. xxx

  19. I loved reading about your journey. Thank-you for sharing, I’m sure that your story will help and inspire women entering into the daunting world of pregnancy.
    I remember having that veggie aversion in the beginning too! I couldn’t face avocados, my favourite, for my entire pregnancy. Ah well, body knows best I guess!
    All the best for you birth sweetness. x

    • Thank you beautiful, and HUGE thank you for your meditations — I’ve been loving popping them on as I sink into an Epsom salt bath and know they’ll be a wonderful companion once I start labouring. Going to share a link in one of the other posts so that all our lovely preg mamas can check them out x

  20. Rachel, thank you for sharing your journey with so much honesty and transparency. I love that you started hating some of the “healthy” foods for a bit :P One question I have, that you certainly don’t need to answer: Did you *always* know you wanted to be a Mom? Or were there things that helped make that clearer for you? I know it’s such an individualized choice, but my husband and I are so ridiculously on the fence… but have a few years to keep thinking on it. I’m just always curious since many people seem to have known forever, but not everyone. Wishing you all the best!!

    • Thank you Valerie!

      To answer your question, yes, I did have an inner knowing that I wanted to have children, but I still had concerns about losing my freedom and a belief that I could only have one or the other — the career-slash-business OR the family — that stuck around until last year.

      This may not be the case for everyone, but looking back, I can see a significant difference in how I viewed starting a family when comparing my later 20’s to my early 30’s.

      So… when you say you have a few years to think on it… allow yourself those years. Let it be a ‘distant’ consideration, and see what your body/ soul/ heart tells you down the track. It may be yes, it may be no. Neither is right or wrong because it’s YOUR desire. x

  21. Beautiful Rach. It brought me so many memories, it’s funny how you forget all of those small details, but reading this makes me feel the memories in my body. It is an amazing experience. I craved oranges on both my pregnancies too and ice, couldn’t get enough of crunching on ice, my husband used to get annoyed at my crunching haha, whenever he sees me eating ice he throws the big question…You aren’t pregnant again, are you?! lol
    Lovely memories, thank you for sharing them and reminding me of the beautiful experience. Look forward to the coming posts. Much love to you, bub and hubby.
    xoxo

  22. I was sent a link to your website by my dear friend Ally Clyne (an amazing new Life coach with a brand new website) because I have recently discovered I’m pregnant. Not with one but with two little miracles! I just wanted to say that it is so good to hear that my feelings and thoughts are not alone. That you too ended up wiling yourself to be sick in order to release the feeling of the uncomfortable, That you craved burgers, that you were so tired it felt like you had a big night out…. It was a refreshing read your post as I am definitely not one to read pregnancy blogs or google information. I agree it’s best left to the professional and allows you to the mindful with your own pregnancy journey Thank you for your beautiful post xxx

    • Thank you for dropping by and leaving a comment Courtney — and huge congrats!

      I have to laugh about the beef burgers (turns out I was SERIOUSLY iron-deficient, so can see that my body was trying to rally some up).

      Grill’d burgers were the treat, and at home, lettuce leaves made for tasty ‘buns.’ Oh pregnancy. x

  23. Be still my heart. There is so much wonderfulness in hearing your story told this way. I’m less than 12 months from a trip down the aisle and something about peaceful, sweet, beginnings of baby stories just make me ache to squeeze that in now. I shouldn’t and wont, but just to imagine is kind of wonderful.
    Dreams were so strange for me when pregnant. Somedays I’d be surrounded by herds of children, others just sitting alone with one. I always saw “myself as a child” in my dreams, but now at almost 8 my daughter looks uncannily like me as a child. But maybe my memory is simply filling in the pieces.
    Remember it’s all a phase, from now until they’re grown, it’s all a phase. Cherish the wonderful and ride out the bad. I can’t wait to hear more about this journey with you.

    xoxo
    Katie
    http://beyondtheclothing.com

  24. Such a beautiful and honest post Rach! I was nodding my head in agreement with so much of what you were saying. My bubba entered the world 11 weeks ago today and she is amazing. Your life is about to change in the most beautiful and heart exploding way! Ava was born on her due date which I learnt was very rare and I was only in hospital for 3 hours and then she arrived. I was so happy to have a natural birth with only gas needed. Giving birth is the most amazing and life altering experience. It pushes you to the limit but just work with Baby Mac and trust your body and what it is telling you, because it speaks to you very loud and clear.

    I am sending you, Ramai and Baby Mac loving vibes!! Much love hunnie and enjoy the newborn baby bubble xoxo

  25. What a great, down-to-earth and so so funny post!
    I have had 2 babies, both completely different experiences but I could totally relate to your weird cravings, moods, excitedness, love… it’s amazing, overwhelming and such a blessing all rolled in to one. Thanks for sharing your journey so far. You will have an amazing birth – your body was made to birth, and you will come out the other side transformed and so much more in touch with yourself. Then the fun begins with your new little darling (oh and the sleepless nights… ) but it’s all worth it. In times of exhaustion and frustration (because we all have them), just tell yourself – this too shall pass.

    Sending you love and light xx
    Kelly

    • ‘This too shall pass’ is the Mama Mantra for sure (so I’m told.) Thank you for the reminder and the kind words.

      (and you know what… I haven’t had a full night’s sleep in 9 months. Cheeky body is getting me well and truly prepped with the multiple wake-ups!) xo

  26. Rach it’s been such a huge pleasure being back on your blog. I did BEBH last year and my own is steadily growing. It was also so wonderful to hear how you were feeling the pull towards motherhood. I totally am as well and completely identify with all the feelings you described, but I also know I want my business to be on more solid ground before I bring a baby into the world. I actually had a card reading yesterday and she said I could wait another year or two. Wishing you all the love in the world for you and your little one and you bring an actual LIFE into the world. Wow. xx

  27. Kia Ora from over the ditch,
    I am thinking warm fuzzies to you and wishing you a fabulous birth. I know everyone gives advice, but for what it’s worth here are my top tips for birth (please ignore if you’re bored of advice, as heartful as it is).
    1. Use the time between surges (contractions) to truly relax more than ever (like letting go of what’s still to come)
    2. Teach your man/support people your 3-4 top affirmations for them to repeat over and over…. those reassuring words of encouragement never get boring when you’re birthing…
    3. Imagine your body as heavy, loose and soft as possible during surges, especially your mouth, cause as above so below and you want that lower opening nice and soft.
    4. Use deep sounds and ask your support people to remind you ‘deep and low’ (rather than freak out higher noises).
    Anyway, so much more I could say…. I’ll stop in a mo. Just remember birth is a normal, yet miraculous part of life. Your body is made for it. 300,000 women will be birthing at the same time as you. Be kind to yourself however your birth unfolds. I was at a birth last week and remembered again, it is full-on but it can be calm, relaxed and powerful.
    warm thoughts to you,
    Anna

  28. You have such a beautiful way with words Rachel! You have captured the first trimester of your pregnancy so beautifully! Parts of it made me feel like I was reading my own pregnancy story! Sending you positive birthing vibes and a whole lot of strength for your little mans arrival into this world xx

  29. What I wouldn’t give to go back to these stages of pregnancy and revel in it again!!! I am a mumma to 2 beautiful, healthy girls. I always wanted and hoped for 3 children and when my second baby was announced as a twin I was thrilled (although a little freaked out too!). Now my beautiful baby girl is 3 years old and my partner refuses to have any more babies. I envy this period in your life Rachel. I wish you all the very best. It’s such a magical time and your darling little baby is getting ready to join us on earth. Beautiful! xxx

    • Beautiful Darien, thank you so much. I’ve wondered (out loud to my husband, who I’m sure laughs on the inside at my musings) whether our little man ‘knows’ he’s on his way soon. What a delicious, mind-bending time. x

  30. Oh my goodness, overwhelming joy going on right over here right now!
    This was such a deeply moving post Rach. So happy for you.

    Thank you for sharing from the heart! And enjoy the rest of this chapter – I hope it is smooth sailing for you all! xxx

  31. Dear Rachel,

    I am so excited for you and your husband. That anticipation right before the baby arrives is almost inexplainable. Bringing a baby into the world (no matter how it happens) is truly a magical experience. Sending you and your growing family many, many blessings.

  32. Oh and I forgot to mention, Rach – if you’re interested, I offer chart readings for babies…super cool and insightful way to ‘get to know’ your baby astrologically, and see how he/she relates to your natal chart, and how you can support him/her. Let me know, I’d love to gift that to you! xox

  33. Rach,
    You are so incredibly amazing. Your writing is so easy to read, so engaging, inspiring, honest and I feel so grateful to have an insight into your life. Ah I can not wait to be a mum some day, and I am so exciting for you and your husband.
    Thank you for sharing, and creating this beautiful online space – your new website is beautiful.
    So happy for you,
    Love Monique xxx

  34. Rachel,
    They are such beautiful words. Baby is so lucky to have a beautiful mumma bear like you.
    All the best with it all.

  35. Gorgeous Lady, you are a gifted story teller and I just loved reading every single part of your mamahood journey. Tears, heartfelt love and absolute awe! Can’t wait to see the little one enter this world. All my love for the next little ‘while’. xox

  36. This made me cry and I’m totally not a cryer! I’m not at the point in my life where I’m thinking about kids, but this was seriously so beautiful. I’m so happy for you and your son is beautiful! I wish you and your family nothing but love and happiness for years and years to come! <3

  37. I was looking on the net for some meaningful shares about the first trimester, as I’m now at 15 weeks, and have been longing for women to reflect my experience back to me. Every woman is so different it seems. In reading your experience, I resonated with a lot of it, from initial feelings of finding out and the importance of friends in early days, to those specific cravings (!!) and the renewed rebound at the beginning of second trimester. I also ordered Ina May’s book on your recommendation. I look forward to reading your experiences with 2nd trimester.

    • Dear Carissa,
      Great you’ve ordered Ina May’s book. It’s excellent, and a brilliant complete package. The stories are so encouraging.
      Anna

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