The Best Thing You Can Do To Make More Friends, Grow Your Community & Be Generally Awesome

Blow other people’s trumpets. 

Send emails jammed with enthusiastic words of encouragement (be specific).
Retweet words of wisdom. Share, share, share. Play your part.
Leave thoughtful comments.
Be a cheerleader (pom poms optional).
Compliment strangers.
Become a magnet for new opportunities… by seeking them.
Think love. Be love.
Hold people in the highest regard.
Ask “who can I help?” – and go do it. Offer your services, add value. Go above and seriously beyond.
Walk into situations expecting the best.
Start a support group. Bring kindred spirits together to form a greater ‘whole.’
Show up, even if you don’t have to.
When people hint at their dreams, ask for more. Listen, applaud, champion.

Keep it real – always.

Marta Jagus 


Run Your Own Race

Ever felt that ego-fuelled desire to be acknowledged? The crippling fear of not being good enough?

But of course. We all have. And much to (what I presume is) our collective dismay, it turns out this paralysing pair are going to rear their heads every once in a while, so I thought it was about time we chatted a little about the ‘competition and comparison trap’ – the times when you lose sight of ‘you’ (glorious, brilliant, you!) because someone else’s glittering lights seem to be outshining and out-twinkling the ones lighting your own backyard.

The Seedy Underbelly of Comparison

When you’re pushing to run someone else’s race – and you’ll know when you’re pushing because there will be this booming echo that tells you you’re not even close – you stop believing in your own delicious worth.

You neutralise your power.

You spend so much time keeping up and trying to be seen that your energy is maxed out on what the competition is doing rather than what you want for yourself. Rather than igniting your greatness, you cede your creative energy focusing on the moves everyone else is making and forgetting that you have these gargantuan, outrageously beautiful qualities inside you that are literally begging to be released.

Confidence Zapping, Limited Living

If that’s not enough, another disastrous thing about using others as your yardstick is that it automatically places a limit on your success.

Think about it for a minute. When you’re hell-for-leather running someone else’s race, is it Obama or Madonna or Oprah you’re comparing yourself to? Not likely. Sure, you might draw inspiration from these (essentially) untouchable idols, but you’re rarely wedging your success right up against theirs by means of comparison.

What’s more likely is that you’re comparing yourself to the girl in the office that just got the promotion you were certain you had in the bag, or the blogger who has you sea-green with envy because they’re freakin’ eve-ry-where, or the skinny girl at the gym that always gets the guy/ the friend that only buys designer/ the one who’s running an ultra-successful business while you’re stuck hammering it out in corporate cubicle hell.

Whatever the dilemma, every time you compare your life to someone else’s life or hinge your happiness on the approval of others, you’re giving away your authentic power to consciously create more splendour in that exquisite life of yours. And it’s a vicious cycle – the more you give it away, the more insecure you feel.

Enough is Enough!


I want you know that you, my darling, are a precious flower and your gifts are needed longed for in this world. PLEASE: never, ever forget that the world is gunning for you to succeed.

I have a little wish – well, actually, it’s more of a hope – and it is that, starting now, you will:

Be a leader, not a follower. Focus on your own self-improvement, show up and give it. Give them you – delightful quirks and all.

Focus on what is astounding, unique, revolutionary, downright awesome about you and the super special way YOU do it. Your own power is already there. That certain j’ne sais qoui you have? All yours. No one else can share this genius with the world. We’re all counting on you to innovate and unleash… so please – go do it.

In your saddest and most triggered moments, you might feel you have nothing to offer the world, but this ain’t true sista. Look at feelings as messages from your soul. Your feelings tell you where you need to make adjustments, to love yourself or to flip your perspective to uncover the lesson in the situation. Dig. And dig some more.

Celebrate other people’s “bigness.” William Hazlitt said: “Just as much as we see in others, we have in ourselves,” so tuck that thought in your pocket and remember that as you applaud the achievements of others, you’re inviting that same energy into your own life. This is a glimpse of what can be possible for you. From a place of gratitude, count your blessings that the world is filled with so many talented people that continually inspire you to rise up and S H I N E.

And above all, remember that the only real competitor you should ever have is yourself.

There’s room enough in this big, wide world for all of us to shine brightly and boldly. Take a deep breath and stand in your power. There’s only one YOU and let it be said – you are perfect just the way you are! 

A couple of q’s (let’s get share-y!) 

+ Have you ever come up against feelings of jealously/ resentment/ wishing your life was as perfect as (what you perceived) someone else’s to be? What triggered it, and what did you do to move past those feelings of ‘lack’ or ‘inadequacy?’

I’d love to hear your thoughts on all this. These feelings are universal, affecting every one of us, and as I said above, they often act as mirrors, reflecting back at us any changes we need to make. What advice would you give someone feeling the burn of comparison? Share the lessons you’ve learned and how you started running your own race again in the comments below!

Images: Mister Sullivan | Ana Cabaleiro 

The Power of One

“Do one thing at a time, and while doing it put your whole soul into it to the exclusion of all else.” ~ Swami Vivekananda

How many things are you simultaneously juggling right now?

At last check, I had six windows open on my computer. I be togglin.’ My messages are open on my phone so I won’t forget to reply to a friend (oh, hold up, I actually did forget to reply to someone earlier). I’m thinking about a blog post for next week. Should I spend today (the Australia Day public holiday) on the computer or making wedding decorations? I really need to get to the Post Office tomorrow to buy stamps for our invites. What about that e-book and blog redesign – practically, could I get them done in the first half of the year? Yes? Maybe? Who knows. Oh gosh, Dad, how long has it been since I called my Dad? The weekend – what’s on this weekend? Baby shower! A friend’s baby shower and a first birthday and I don’t have presents for either. Yikes.

Welcome to my brain. What a hoot. Sound like you too?

The truth is, a lot of us are maxing capacity right now. Our focus is off because we’re rushing/ toggling/ over-exerting/ adrenal-zapping all over the place and sadly, we’re often doing ourselves an injustice trying to do more than humanly possible in totally unrealistic carriages of time. It’s exhausting.

Here’s a proposal: 

Why don’t we get all wild and rambunctious and flip things on their head for a bit? What if, instead of doing a legion of things half-heartedly, we made the decision to hone in on one important thing every day, and committed – no matter what – to getting it done?

Revolutionary? Too simplistic? Impossibilité? Not if it’s taking you closer to achieving your long-term goals and making you happy and more fulfilled in the process.

Here’s the deal:

FOR SELF-ACTUALISATION: Define one important long-term goal and work on it for an hour every day.

Pull out your diary and have a good look at your goals. If you were told you could only choose one of them to focus for the rest of the year, which would it be?

I’ve started putting a number priority beside the tasks on my daily to-do list (1 is obviously the Most Pressing Thing and 10 is the Can Probably Wait stuff) which I’ve found to be really helpful to ensure I don’t get struck down with the dreaded Overwhelm.

Try doing this with your goals list until you identify the one goal that you’d most like to achieve in 2012 – then start chipping away at it, bit by bit. It’s as easy as that. 60 minutes a day for 365 days is equal to 21,900 minutes, or 365 hours, spent working on your exceptional goal every year.

Pretty impressive when you put like that, huh?

FOR GROWTH + INSPIRATION: Read/ watch/ listen to one thing that inspires you every day.

If you can, do this first thing as there’s nothing better than starting the day listening to an inspiring podcast, watching an awesome video online or reading a thought-provoking blog post that really gets the cogs churning.

My favourite resources:

Oprah’s Lifeclass videos

+ Cheryl Richardson’s podcasts. Cheryl interviews provocative thinkers whose work is changing the world in some way in her free podcasts (search her name in iTunes to find the list) and they’re super inspiring. My favourites are the interviews with Natalie Goldberg (author of one of my favourite books on writing ‘Bird by Bird), Louise Hay and Jackie Collins.

+ Gabrielle Bernstein’s podcasts and guided meditations – also free on iTunes – and her brilliant videos.

+ TED Talks (scintillating stuff!) My faves are Elizabeth Gilbert’s talk on nurturing creativity and Brene Brown’s incredible talk on vulnerability and wholeheartedness.

FOR EDUCATION + ENLIGHTENMENT: Read one chapter of a good book every day.

If you’re anything like me and order new books like ink and paper stores are about to be completely annihilated, you’re probably a touch overwhelmed by the growing stack on your nightstand. No time, too many to get through, why bother starting – and all that jazz.

It’s all about chunking. Reading one chapter a day of a book with 15 chapters will have you finishing it in just over two weeks, and I don’t know about you, but that seems pretty manageable to me. There’s something insanely satisfying about holding a finished book in your hands and displaying it proudly on your bookshelf, so if you’re a book-fiend like me, make a little time to immerse yourself in those pages. Books open doors, in your mind and in your life.

FOR HEALTH + WELLNESS: Allocate one hour of ‘you time.’

Whether it’s to exercise, cook an amazing meal bursting with nutrients, meditation time, stretching out on the yoga mat, doing a top-to-toe beauty blitz, or doing whatever else replenishes your energy stores and brings harmony to your life, commit to it. It doesn’t have to be all at once – you might break your hour into halves or quarters – but it’s so necessary. We all spend a large portion of our time meeting the needs of others and it’s so incredibly important we pay ourselves the same respect.

FOR POSITIVITY + MAGIC-MAKING: Write down one thing to be grateful for every day. 

You might have noticed in my Making Me Happy posts that (on average) I post about seven things that have really stood out for me over the prior week. That’s the equivalent of one blessing per day, and I think we can all agree, on even the darkest of days, there’s always something (no matter how tiny) that we can send the universe a little ‘thank you’ for.

I loved reading back on my gratitude lists from last year when I was pulling together my 2011 in Review post and I can’t speak highly enough about documenting your daily joy. Added up over a year, that’s a shipload of pleasure!

Additional inspiration:

+ Choose one affirmation to guide your day/ week/ month. Great examples here, here and here – and I wrote a bunch in this post too.

+ Join the lovely Chantelle Elem’s Photo-a-Day Challenge – the February challenge is just around the corner!

+ Write one paragraph in your journal every night to describe your day. Detail how you felt, what you did, who you chatted to, what steps you took towards your dreams.

+ Decide that instead of trying to catch up with all your friends every weekend – racing here, there and everywhere – you’ll commit to seeing just one of your beautiful friends and give them your full, undivided attention.

+ What are your thoughts on ‘the power of just one thing?’ Do you agree that doing less and doing it well leads to greater achievement of your dreams?

Images: Faded from the winter | Live Now 

How To Overcome Overwhelm and Save Your Sanity in The Process

A theme that’s been cropping up a bit in my life lately – both personally and for the friends I’ve been speaking to – is the mire of overwhelm. Seems we’re submerged in it, drowning in a deluge of end-of-year-itis and unrealistic expectations as we recklessly push ourselves to get everything done before December 31.

The crush of overwhelm can be rapid and it usually goes a little something like this: one moment you’re on top of things – flying through your to-do list, taking on new projects with an enthusiastic “YES!”, squeezing in tasks because you’re feeling ambitious! energetic! high on achievement!… and then you take it too far. Overstimulated can very quickly veer off into the seedy backstreets of Overwrought and Overwhelmed, and it ain’t pretty.

I was there myself a few weeks ago and through a bit of soul-searching and my fair share brown paper bag breathing (well, almost), I found a few easy ways to regain a sense of calm before stress completely blindsided me, as shared below.

Inhale + exhale. Then move.


Stop for a moment. Scale back the intensity of your overwhelm by finding a quiet place – if you’re at work, jump in your car; if you’re at home, get horizontal on your bed – and once you’re there, give the following breathing exercise a go.

Visualise your overwhelm – picture it as a big, black ball or whatever works for you – and when you have it clear in your mind, slowly and deliberately breathe in. Let the breath spread across your cells and flow right down into your belly, and when you exhale, imagine your anxiety shrinking as you grow bigger in stature. Imagine yourself transcending the overwhelm until eventually it grows so small it disappears completely.

The next step is even easier (and I’ll bet you a million homemade vanilla cupcakes you’re feeling better by this point anyway). Get outside. Walk it out. Five or ten minutes of fresh air will save you hours (upon hours) of going round-in-circles as you try to be productive in a panicked state. Be kind to yourself. You have permission to breathe, release, move. It’s that effortless.

Plan ahead (it’s kinda crucial).


When you’re in overdrive – launching your new website on a ridiculous deadline, finishing up that last-minute freelance project, carelessly scattering your energy in the direction of anyone and anything that will take it – tunnel vision sets in.

“Hello, drowning here! How am I meant to find time to plan out next week when I’m presently paralysed?” you cry.

I hear you but you know why it’s important? Because you don’t want to feel this frazzled next week. Or ever.

I’ve mentioned before that I use Evernote to stay organised and it’s been a serious sanity-saver. If Evernote was a guy and I was single, it’d be ON. Try it.

To stay on top of my blog, I create Notes in the app for my Blogs to Bookmark and Making Me Happy posts each week and fill them up as I discover a wicked site or when something meaningful happens. I also flesh out juicy ideas for blog posts – bullet points/ lists a-plenty/ snappy sentences – so that when I come to actually writing the post, a big chunk is already done. Adding a couple of words to Evernote when they’re top of mind takes me less than 30 seconds, but saves me a bucketload of time in the long run.

Which brings me to my next point…

Break ambitious (overwhelming, glee-sucking) goals into manageable strides. 


Does it ALL really need to be done RIGHT. THIS. VERY. SECOND? Not always. Rarely, in fact, we just tell ourselves it does.

You can work your priorities one of two ways. Either commit one (or more) full day/s to a specific task and knock it off your list without distractions or attempting to do “bits and pieces of everything” or, break your bigger tasks down into bite-size pieces and do one small part each day until the job is done.

Narrow your priorities. It seems rudimentary when it’s spelled out in black and white like that, but it’s “all or nothing” thinking that gets us in trouble in the first place. There are options, and when you slash the non-urgents off the list (or create a second list to house them) stuff gets done. And we move on to the bigger, brighter, bolder business of kicking ass.

Cut the stimulants.


Last week I noticed sugar was making me anxious. Racy heart (and not the sexy type), shorter fuse, full-on saccharine suckiness. I’m a sweet tooth from way back so I danced around the issue and blamed my feelings of overwhelm on everything but sugar, but after conducting a few “experiments” on the days I was feeling particularly busy and overloaded, I found that – without a shadow of doubt – sugar was exacerbating the problem.

Caffeine has the same muddling effect, so take heed next time you’re feeling wound-up and on edge. That “reward” or “treat” you’re giving yourself in the hope of feeling better may just be the root of your antsiness.

Compassion + connection uncomplicates things.  


Have you ever noticed how voicing something that’s been swirling around in your head actually makes sense of it? The words come tumbling out and you realise you’ve found the answer to the very thing that’s been troubling you? Just saying the words to someone who cares is often enough to knock the top off the pressure.

Who are your big believers? Your mentors, co-conspirators, the Chief Champions of You? Can you get some brainstorming happening – perhaps lay a few different perspectives on the table? Share some mental mojo?

People love to help. All you gotta do is ask.

Take a technology hiatus.

Ahh, the old social media overload. I was feeling it in a major way a week or so ago (which is unfortunate, given I write a blog, Tweet and update the ‘Book with vigour… oh and work in Digital Communications by day and therefore spend EVERY DAY AND NIGHT ONLINE). (thank you, I needed to yell a bit).

The solution? Drop offline. Yeah, you heard me. Press the off button – with gusto. Lower your laptop lid. Retrain your thumb to do useful things like gripping the handlebars of your beach cruiser or massaging your lover. Contrary to popular opinion, thumbs were not invented to refresh the Twitter timeline on your iPhone 678 times a day.

Take a digital sabbatical when you’re uninspired by the infinite supply of information being catapulted your way.

When you realise you’re spending your days obsessively checking this and that and thinking “Why am I doing this?” it’s time for a break or a clean up. Unfollow people that are filling your feed with negativity. Unsubscribe from all those e-newsletters you delete anyway. Really think about whether you need a presence on every social networking site.

+ I’d love to hear your thoughts on this universal affliction. What triggers that “completely overwhelmed” feeling for you? What do you do to nourish your (hyper-excited) spirit and reclaim some semblance of sanity when you’re in over your head?

Image: Brooke Shaden

11:11:11: What Do You Desire?

Do you often glance at the clock, or grab your phone to check the time and find that it’s just gone 11:11 or 1:11?

I do. On an almost daily basis.

There’s a lot of talk about the 11:11 phenomenon and what it means, but the general consensus (and I’m about to get a bit woo woo on you here) is that when 11:11 consistently appears, “lightworkers” are being called to action. Or in an easier-to-digest framework, you (lightworker extraordinaire that you are) are being given a gentle tap on the shoulder from the Universe to remind you to live spontaneously, trust your hunches and lean in towards faith and truth.

Heart-opening stuff.

Further, it’s said the 11 sequence is accompanied by a sort of energetic flow that takes you on a grand tour through the outer corners of your mind – the place where revelation and ‘aha moments’ sit covered in dusty debris. This means – if you so desire – your ability to tap into truth and inherent wisdom is heightened, and so are your abilities to manifest your thoughts into reality.

Yes, yes and YES! Sound good or what?

11 Appearing In My Life


I’m haunted (in the most delightful way) by the number 11 and below are just a few ways it appears in my life:

+ Birth: I was born in November, the 11th month.

+ Death: When I received the call from my Dad a week ago about my Granny passing away, I hung up the phone, looked at the time and it was 11:11 on the dot (this often happens when something big or out of the ordinary occurs for me).

+ Marriage: We wanted to get married on a Saturday so Friday 11 May was out for our wedding, so instead we chose the twelfth – 12.05.12, or 1 + 2 + 5 + 1 + 2 = 11.

+ Blog: My blog was launched on 11 June.

Tech: Funnily enough, the digits of my mobile phone number add up to 11.

And that’s just the start.

2011 (there’s that 11 again) has been a huge year for my personal growth and I’ve found that it’s usually when my energy is elevated and I’m going through a period of personal change (or intense pondering) that  11 shows up in my life more frequently. The vibe I’ve gotten this year is that I’m on the right track and my “buddies” are giving me a little nudge to say “Hey kiddo, you’re doing good – just keep those wheels a-spinnin’ alright. Stay hungry, keep movin.’”

And that’s just what I intend on doing.

Harnessing The Power of 11


It would be remiss of me not to say first up: Happy 11.11.11 to you all! May your day be magnificent and rich with opportunity as you connect with your “inside people” (as Sarah Wilson calls them) and cast your dreams wide and far. It’s time to step into your starring role!

Today, and the next time you see 11:11, be cognizant of the subtle energies around you. Hang out a bit in that shimmering heart space of yours and reflect on what’s playing on your mind. Really ponder what it is you’re hungry for.

You might have heard the expression “11:11 – Make a Wish” but I encourage you to take things one step further by looking within and asking:

What big ideas am I contemplating right now?

What are you hearing? You’re being given a tremendous vote of confidence from the Universe right now and that shiny, big window of opportunity is now open.  Everything is aligning, and you’re preparing for something huge and spectacular to unfold in your life. Bravely accept the invitation to grow.

Something a Bit Exciting!


Given that today is the 11th of the month, it also happens to be the five month birthday of my bumbling bloggy baby, In Spaces Between – a fact that thrills me to no end!

A ginormous thank you for checking in on her daily, for filling her little head with words of wisdom and for holding her hand as she grows and stretches with each passing day. Muchas gracias senoritas!

+ And now for a couple of questions: Do you see 11:11 or 1:11, and if so what does it mean to you? Have you ever thought about it in the context of being anything more than a bunch of numbers? I’m so interested to know so let’s chat in the comments below!

Images: 1. Pinterest 2. Jonas Peterson 3. Castle Crowns Cottages

Shimmering Snippets of Advice For Busy People

On worrying what other people think… 

What stops most of us from embracing who we are and standing in our power is a gripping fear of what other people think. There will always be someone who has a different opinion to you, someone who would have done things differently (not better, just differently), someone who doesn’t get you or someone who doesn’t reciprocate the kindness you extend to them. You can either allow other peoples’ opinions to control your life, playing small to meet their smallness, or you can rise above, take a risk and be who you were always meant to be. When you ask yourself why do other people’s opinions matter (and you know your ego will want to know!) ask “Why does this bother me?” It’s not about you, it’s about them. Stop living small. Stop apologising for who you are. Stop squeezing yourself into boxes others present to you. Wayne Dyer summed it up perfectly: “What people think of me is none of my business.”

Celebrate other people’s success like your own…

We are all meant to be big. To live delicious, vibrant lives. When a friend tells you they got a promotion/ bought a new house/ are having a baby/ met the man or woman of their dreams, celebrate with them. Be there, wholeheartedly, and share that excitement with them knowing that in sharing their joy, you invite the same energy into your life. We’re all good at being the shoulder to cry on when our nearest and dearest need support, but often we hold back when our friend needs us to be their cheerleader, the person that says “I’m so proud of what you’ve achieved.” Sometimes the jealousy or insecurity we have around the success of others arises because we don’t have the faith that the kind of success our friend is experiencing could also one day be our own. It can be and it will be.

You are enough…

You were born enough. Your work is enough. Comparing yourself to others makes us feel inadequate so remind yourself today that you are exactly where you’re supposed to be and you’ll get to where you want to be in good time. The number of followers you have on your blog is enough. The hours you billed last month are enough. Your house is clean enough, you give your child more than enough love every day. Repeat after me: I AM ENOUGH.

On overwhelm and saying no… 

You can’t do everything – and that’s ok. More than ok, in fact. The most important thing is to be present. I’ve never known the world to fall apart when everything on my to-list hasn’t been done. Learn to say no. Fear of saying no is rooted in the fear that if we’re not “yes” people, we won’t be liked, which is totally incorrect. Be confident, drop the guilt, lessen the load, give yourself a break and say no to the things that scatter your energy and take you further away from where you want to be.

Vulnerability fosters connection… 

Instead of layering mask upon mask and presenting the world with a carefully edited version of yourself, stand strong in your authenticity. Let the real you shine. Give up the need to be right all the time, to erect walls to hide your pain. Let people in.

Share your best ideas… 

There is more than enough for everyone when we tap in to our imaginations. Holding onto ideas you love creates a poverty consciousness, playing into the fear that you’ll never get another idea to fill its place. Releasing your ideas into the world frees up space for your next big idea to come along. Learning is a forward motion, understand this and take comfort in the knowledge that as you grow, the idea you think is your best yet will be overshadowed by something better. Give freely, help people, don’t hold back for fear they’ll “copy” or “take credit” for your bright idea. I love this passage from Paul Arden’s book “It’s Not How Good You Are, It’s How Good You Want to Be:”

“The problem with hoarding (your ideas) is that you end up living off your reserves. Eventually you’ll become stale. If you give away everything you have, you are left with nothing. This forces you to look, to be aware, to replenish. Somehow the more you give away the more comes back to you. Ideas are open knowledge. Don’t claim ownership. They’re not your ideas anyway, they’re someone else’s. They’re out there floating by on the ether. You just have to put yourself in a frame of mind to pick them up.”

On judging others…

When we judge others, we’re usually judging something we don’t like about ourselves. When we seek feedback, it’s because we’re starved for validation and approval. If we see others doing something we’re afraid of trying, our  automatic response might be to judge that person because it exposes our own fears. We’re left wondering “Why can they do it when we can’t?” and our response is to judge them to make us feel better. Being aware that most judgements of others are ego strategies to avoid uncomfortable feelings, giving us personal insights into the areas of our lives that need a bit of love.


Remember to walk in the truth of who you are.
Refuse to dumb down.
Refuse to beat yourself up for your mistakes. Accept them and move on.
Find what inspires you and start. Take those first wobbly steps towards your purpose.
Identify the areas of your life you’ve been pushing down and release them.
Don’t be afraid to show the world how messy and flawed you are. We all are.
Let other people help you out and be the one to help others.
Stay golden.

Images: 1. Pretty Stuff 2. Catherine Roach

How I Fell Off the Detox Wagon

I’m pretty sure lemon and pear cheesecake, potato-based curry, French fries and ice-cream aren’t on the Clean program, yet I’ve eaten all of these in the past three days.

Oops. Big oops. I fell off the wagon, and I fell good, grazed knees and all.

I’ll explain…

It all started on Friday with me staring out the window at work, drinking in the afternoon sun and the summery haze over the mountains in the distance, fantasising about having a nice glass of chilled white wine after work. I don’t know what it is about Fridays but I guess because it’s pretty rare for me to hit the town partying these days, Friday or Saturday nights have become my ‘treat’ nights where I’ll have a wine or two, or a nice dessert after dinner. Fine normally, but not so fine when you’re doing the no alcohol, no wheat, no sugar, no dairy thing.

I managed to hold off on the post-work wine and my fiance Ramai and I headed out to an awesome new vegetarian restaurant, where we ate a mix of salads (look at us go!) and a coconut milk-based potato curry (oh, wait, was this on the Yay, Eat Heaps of This! List?) Something tells me no.

In a move critics are calling “irresponsible” and “idiotic,” we then decided that the cheesecake in the cabinet – winking back at us in all its cheesecakey glory – was something we should definitely be putting in our mouths immediately, if not sooner. Insert (a very loud) OH. DEAR.

This is what happened

It tasted incredible. We hoovered it down. We went home. I felt sick, like I’d eaten waaaay too much food. Immediate headache. Once home, we lay on the bed watching TV… and passed out at 8:30pm, fully-clothed, make-up still on (for me, obviously – Ramai has stopped wearing mascara, too clumpy he reckons) (haha). It was as if someone had just flicked the ‘power down’ button. Ramai slept through but I woke up at 11pm feeling like I’d downed a few bottles of that chilled white wine I’d been coveting earlier – my tongue was all swollen and I was seriously – actually, severely – dehydrated. Yuck yuck yuckity yuck.

Of course that wasn’t the end though. After The Cheesecake Incident, I went to Brisbane on Saturday for a hang out day with my best friends and since I’d already slipped up, I found it a little too easy to ‘allow’ myself to have a Boost smoothie (which we all know are LOADED with sugar), as well as the fries that came with my grilled snapper for lunch. Oh and I ‘accidentally’ had an ice cream yesterday. When it rains, it buckets cats and dogs pours, hey?

This is what I found out

Sugar headaches suck. Eating sugar makes you crave more sugar and once you have that taste for sweetness, you seek it out often, reaching for more ‘natural’ sweet stuff like apples, dates, dried fruit (anything that will satisfy your cravings). Sugar also makes you feel agitated – more on edge – and gives you strange dreams when you’ve been without it for a period of time. Are we having fun yet? All in all, it was a disappointing slip up that lead to further silly slip ups, but since I firmly believe there’s a lesson in everything I thought I’d take the opportunity to confess, first and foremost, and share the things I did to get back on track with my Life Reset. My hope is that they might help you do the same if you’ve lost interest, fallen off the wagon or have been contemplating throwing in the towel. We’re so close now (only one week to go!) so read on to find out how to get re-motivated and recommitted if you’ve lost sight of your shimmering goal.

1. Forgive Yourself

Before you can move on, you need to let go of all that soul-sucking guilt. Don’t mope around feeling sorry for yourself, or, like me, use it as a trigger to indulge some more – instead, get up, dust yourself off and refocus. This applies to any goal, not just the food-related ones. Did you aim to be more positive and instead spend the last few days whinging about your life? Or declare you’d quit cigarettes for good and have been allowing yourself a sneaky one (or 10) every night? What about those that had planned to exercise daily and pretty much spent the last week exercising your TV remote finger and not much else? All of that doesn’t matter from this point forward. Today is a new day. Love yourself enough to put your slip ups in past and let’s all move onwards and upwards, shall we?

2. Take Action

Now that we’ve got the guilt-trip out of the way, it’s time to take action. Deliberate action is the only way to regain control and grab hold of our dreams. Grab a notepad and make a list of what isn’t working. What is it about your goal/ situation that isn’t lighting your fire? How can you improve it? What do you need help with? Who can you turn to for advice or assistance? Jot it all down. For me, I’ve found it useful to read through my first Life Reset post and all the inspiring comments that accompanied it, and I’ve drawn up a page in my journal that says ‘Power Week – 6 Days To Luminosity!’ (you might remember that luminous is the word I’ve chosen to focus on). Under that bold heading I’ve detailed the things I’m going to do this week to stay on track – exercise, filling our pantry with lots of good food, going to the supermarket as soon as I get to work so that I have lots of healthy snacks in my drawer, lots of sleep, journalling and so on. It’s so easy to have high hopes and high-octane, vigourous determination when goals are new and exciting but it’s when the sheen wears off that the real test surfaces. Push through the resistance. Be strong, and focus on how amazing you’ll feel at the end, knowing you’ve achieved something extraordinary!

3. Fail Forward

Sometimes we get so scared to fully commit ourselves – both legs, both arms, heart and head ALL in –  that we self-sabotage. I’m still not quite sure if this is what has happened to me, or if it’s more a case of habit/ temptation winning out over common sense, but the surest way to tell a failure from a success is whether a bump in the road means you shut down the whole operation and walk away… or whether you see it as an important part of the learning process and you get the hell on with things. Otherwise known as ‘failing forward.’ The premise is simple: start (as we did two weeks ago at the beginning of the Life Reset, stars in our eyes and ambition coursing through our veins), make a mistake (yep, did that, wearing the badge), do a bit of analysing (why did that happen again?) then correct your course and keep cruising forward. This knowledge will ensure you’re better equipped to make the right decision next time temptation arises.

4. Be Prepared

With the exception of the ice cream I ate yesterday, which was purely a boredom thing, the other two deviations from my detox occurred when I was eating out. The key here for me: eliminate temptations by eating at home and be prepared. I’ve already planned a range of hearty meals for this week so that my mind doesn’t wander off and imagine all the things I’m supposedly ‘missing out’ on.

If your goal is to increase your exercise, make this the week that you set your alarm half an hour earlier and get organised by laying your exercise clothes out the night before. Have that exercise on the very top of your to-do list – a non-negotiable. If you exercise after work and a friend asks you to meet for dinner, tell her you’ll be running late as you need to hit the gym/ running track/ yoga class before you meet up. For those looking for soaring new levels of productivity, creativity and positivity this week, start reading. Fill your head with magical words and divine thoughts. Talk to inspiring people. Reach out and connect. Practice random acts of kindness. Make someone’s day!

Ultimately, let’s all (publicly) pledge to stay the course. The Life Reset is over in six short days so if you’re killing it and don’t need a reminder to get back on the proverbial horse, hurrah for you – you’re an inspiration to us all! – but if you need a little nudge, this is it. Commit to never-ending improvement in small increments. You deserve it. x

+ Have you stuck to your Life Reset? Need a final push to get you to the finish line?

Image: 1. We Heart It  2. Julian Bialowas