“I’m stuck, lost, in need of direction. I know what I want but how do I get there?”
You know what living a magnificent life means for you? It’s following the blazing inspiration that’s alight in your heart and seeing it through from start to heavenly end. I’m talking about your vision, your genius, the dazzling gifts bestowed upon you. You know, your birthright.
I know it can appear hard to get yourself ‘there’ because ‘there’ seems like this far-off place where magical things happen and spirits fly free – no longer compromised or buried inside meaningless living – but I want you to comfort yourself with the fact that instead of tackling the whole 1000-piece puzzle at once, it’s okay to simply connect the bottom corner to the next piece. And then add a piece after that. And maybe another when the spirit moves you.
Great whopping books are written word by word, page by page, just like houses are built brick by brick. You could do worse than adopt the same lead when it comes to The Reason You’re Here on Earth.
“If you follow your bliss, you put yourself on a kind of track that has been there all the while, waiting for you, and the life that you ought to be living is the one you are living. Wherever you are — if you are following your bliss, you are enjoying that refreshment, that life within you, all the time.” ~ Joseph Campbell
“I’m scared of going it alone… and I’m scared of admitting that.”
Courageous transitions call for support so:
Forget this: it’s shameful and weak to ask for help; and
Know this: asking for help is powerful. It’s clever and brilliant and invites ease into your life, allowing you feel held and present while you focus on your soul’s work.
“How do I know if it’s right for me?”
Simply tune in to your deepest intuition, your inner whisper, the oracle inside that just… knows.
“We often hesitate to follow our intuition out of fear. Most usually, we are afraid of the changes in our own life that our actions will bring. Intuitive guidance, however, is all about change. It is energetic data ripe with the potential to influence the rest of the world. To fear change but to crave intuitive clarity is like fearing the cold, dark night while pouring water on the fire that lights your cave. An insight the size of a mustard seed is powerful enough to bring down a mountain-sized illusion that may be holding our lives together. Truth strikes without mercy. We fear our intuitions because we fear the transformational power within our revelations.” ~ Caroline Myss
When you learn to not only hear that soft, true and valid voice within, but to trust it completely, everything shifts. Call a committee meeting with your inner wisdom today.
“It feels like I’m constantly pushing. Why is everything I do so goddamn hard?”
Stop doing the things that kill your energy. If you let it die, it will die. Pleasedontletitdie.
“How do I stop feeling inadequate, not good enough?”
Left to her own devices, your inner critic is a bit of a bitch. She’ll show up unannounced when you’re feeling vulnerable or out of your comfort zone and dish up her own special brand of noxious nonsense, just ’cause she can. Just ’cause she knows you’ll cop it.
Protect your tender self and examine all the facts. Are they true? Really? Really?
Decide whether you’re going to allow your limiting beliefs, or the echo of your parents or your boss or whoever else you’re holding in a place of authority, keep you from shining like the luminous beacon of light you are. Write your fears and doubts and murkiest thoughts on paper to take the first step in releasing them. There are outrageously beautiful qualities inside you. Blaze.
“But… it’s not perfect.”
Good news: nothing is. Perfection is a myth. What’s admirable is that you are infinitely and actively growing, loving and evolving. Even when you fail miserably and publicly. Even when your thing isn’t tuned and preened within an inch of its life.
Instead of striving to be perfect, take heed of Tony Robbins advice and aim instead to be a sublimely flawed human being.
“Live life fully while you’re here. Experience everything. Take care of yourself and your friends. Have fun, be crazy, be weird. Go out and screw up! You’re going to anyway so you might as well enjoy the process. Take the opportunity to learn from your mistakes: find the cause of your problem and eliminate it. Don’t try to be perfect. Just be an example of being human.”
Sky-high expectations and crippling doubts – we won’t be needing your services anymore. Thank you anyway.
“I’m kinda awkward, a bit weird. How do I fit in?”
Embrace what makes you different. I was thinking about the things I’ll never be recently. I’ll never be totally conservative because although on the whole I can be quiet obedient, there’s this part of me that likes to rebel. I’ll never be a hard-hitting journalist, because I’m not into confrontation. I’ll never wear Peter Pan collars and collect vintage oil paintings and cute owl trinkets because that’s not MY style. There are people that do all that and be all that (I know and love those people), with far more spunk than I ever could. What I’m left to step into is my own authenticity.
I want you to know – hand-on-heart – that your (self-diagnosed) awkwardness or the things that are different and vulnerable are no doubt the things the world loves most about you. Come alive being fabulously you.
“What if I fail?”
Sometimes we resist the things we know are good for us because we’re afraid of who we’ll become. Thing is though gorgeous, worry is like a prayer for something bad to happen.
If you fail, you’ll pick yourself back up again. If you falter, you’ll eventually find your way – or another way. Leave the small stuff behind and promise us you’ll play bigger.
Other random mind-benders and flipped and dipped perspectives:
1 // Life happens for you – not to you.
2 // Instead of “having to do all these things” you “get to do all these things.”
3 // The only permission you need is your own.
4 // Struggles are our defining moments.
5// Ali Brown (via Denise Duffield-Thomas) asks: “What would millionaire {your name} do?” So, what would millionaire you do? Millionaire you would book it/ do it/ take it/ leave it/ launch at it. Consider yourself nudged.
6// It’s OK to pull back from the world. And as long as you know that ‘wherever you go, there you are’ it’s totally OK to hightail it out of here for a while. A change in location will annihilate blockages like nobody’s biz.
7// When you’re exceptionally busy and stressed and over it, be of service. Taking the focus off your own issues is guaranteed to mellow the madness.
8// And it’s worth reminding yourself that sometimes, just sometimes, not getting what you want can be the biggest blessing of all.
The inspiration for this post came from the questions I asked on Facebook a few days ago: “What are you struggling with? What’s grinding your gears, stealing your spark, putting a big ol’ dampener on things?” It also comes from conversations and emails and the things that crop up in my own life. These are universal conundrums, felt by us all.
+ If you didn’t get a chance to share your challenges on Facebook, I encourage you to let them unfurl here.
+ Let’s get share-y: what works for you when you’re going through a rough patch? Unleash your tips/ advice/ shiny nuggets of wisdom below.
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Images: Dream Yourself Along | Sankaku | Ethereal Taurus
Thank you…from the very bottom of my heart, thank you <3
I am printing this out and sticking it on my wall next to my bed in my dorm so that every morning when I wake up, I'll read it and believe it.
Love, joy, and deep, deep gratitude to you always xo
Thank you Shanny – deep gratitude to YOU for being here! x
My biggest challenge was realising that life didn’t owe me anything. That if good things were going to happen, then I was going to have to make them happen.
Once I learnt this, everything was so much more clear.
I am challenged by life every single day and I love it!
Soph xx from timetobefabulous.wordpress.com
Soph, that’s such a beautiful lesson – thank you for reminding us here. WE owe it to ourselves to live out our full potential.
Big happy Friday hugs to you! xx
Ah, Rach, I read your post this morning and have been wanting to comment all day, but work has been busy, busy, busy! I seriously LOVE this post, for so many reasons. A major one is the time and effort you clearly put into this post in responding to many of the comments that came to you through Facebook. Time is precious, and I suspect that your time is especially full with many other things, and so even writing this post, regardless of content, is a big projection of love and respect out to your community. So thank you.
I also love the post for everything this is in it – your soulful, supportive, inspiring words. They simultaneously lit a fire under and within – in that they stirred me to move, to make a difference, but in a wholly positive and not-at-all-intimidating-or-overwhelming way. If that’s what you were going for then you totally nailed it.
Ok, so to FINALLY get around to your question! My greatest challenge at the moment is, without a doubt, trying to complete my PhD. Sometimes my progress feels so slow and laborious that I wonder if I’ll ever get to the end at all. Some days the weight of all the work that I need to do is so heavy that I feel lost and shrunken. Interestingly, the way I’ve found to best deal with it is a version of your own advice in this post – just write a little more each day, and chip away at it, bit by bit. Parts make a whole.
x
Oh Rach, I literally cried when I read this… Goodness me that doesn’t happen often!! Seriously.
Your honesty, and heartfelt advice really moved me. You’re so right about these things, I love the Joseph Campbell quote too – that one is going to be filed away and printed out!! It certainly shows that you read all of our comments.
I came online to do more research about my choices and possibilities for the future, and I found this. Sign? Yes! Acknowledged and appreciated? Hells yes. Now to USE this advice to move myself forward and out of this place of self-doubt and fear.
Thank you beautiful, thank you!!
xx
WOW! This felt so good oozing into my brain.
Bloody gorgeous. xxx
Love you darlin x
Kylie, so glad you made it back here because this comment has just made my weekend :)
So glad this spoke to you (and thank you for your super kind, super thoughtful words).
I love how you’ve taken the idea of “chunking” and applied that to your PhD. Yes, it might seem like a GARGANTUAN task but like the old saying goes “The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step.”
PS: Your site is a dream. Just thought you should know that. xx
Emily: Oh sweets, sounds like it touched something in you which is wonderful – the words we need to hear find us somehow don’t they? Keep me posted with your progress – and please drop me a line if you ever want to chat/ bounce ideas off someone. That’s what I’m here for! xx
Tara: Oozing was what I was aiming for petunia! LOVE YOU TOO xx
Hey Rach,
Just read this post this morning and loved it! Especially that quote from Tony Robbins.. so true! This post was written form e today, thank you!
xx
For Me, not Form e! haha
Happy to hear it reached you when you needed it Liz! x
What a beautiful post gorgeous lady…
I think this resonates deep within us all, thank you for sharing your thoughts and inspiring others to think about it (including me)
As for your question!!!My biggest challenge at the moment is to not compare myself to others. As I build up my business I find it hard to not compare myself to others who seem to be doing great so effortlessly. At times it has been tough and I just want to give in…but I havent and this is what I learnt so far
1. Never give up…its usually when things seem the most hopeless that success is just around the corner. The people who dont give up are the ones who succeed. All good things take time, energy, intend, patience and hard work…
2. Never compare yourself to anyone else. Create your own authentic universe. When you put your love and good intent into your work, you attract the right people. Something I quoted on my facebook page recently “So I have given up trying to be like anybody else…I have decided to create my own world….filled with things that feed and nourish my own mind and body…I trust in my own authentic guidance and know that the universe will bring me what I need. Its a beautiful moment when you release and surrender….and just be and let be…”
3. Be Grateful and see the small opportunities – .You get more of what you focus on….when you are happy with what you have already got, that’s your focus and you send out positive vibrations and the universe rewards you with more…also choose to see the small opportunities – the universe rewards you over time…starting with small and sometimes easily forgettable opportunities….its when you can see and appreciate these opportunities that the universe starts gradually providing you with bigger and more meaningful opportunities…
4.Be bold and just ask – Its amazing how often the universe says yes, you just have to ask first…..yes I did all the passive asking (which is a strong foundation in the asking process and should never be left out) such as affirmations, meditations, visualisation….however this could only take me so far….I needed to get ballsy and go find my own opportunities….as it is very rare that opportunities just fall in your lap….I learnt to get creative, and then ask people and organisations for what I wanted. Yes I got way more No’s than yes’s….but I did get YES…
.
5.Last of all – Drop all fear…drop the fear of rejection because if you never ask you will never know…drop the fear of competition because there is enough love, abundance and opportunity for everyone in this world and finally drop the fear of not good enough, never compare yourself to anyone else because you are on your own journey and have your own lessons to learn – when you compare yourself to others you lose your focus and where your focus goes your energy flows.
Delightful, gem-of-a-woman Claire… thank you so much for stopping by and opening your heart to leave such a lovely, thoughtful comment for us all.
It’s always been my aim that the comments section here expands the topic I’ve written on, to fill the gaps and provide readers with “This is how I do/ did it” type wisdom, and I want to extend my deepest gratitude to you today for doing just that. You’ve added so much to the conversation here with your generous advice.
Number 3 particularly jumps out at me, because I think when you’ve got that one nailed, the rest starts to fall into place quite magically. Comparison and competition says “I’m not enough” or “I don’t have enough” and gratitude flips that thought right on its head by saying “Yes, yes you do sweetheart – just look.”
Where you are right now is perfect. What you’re doing right now is perfect. Enjoy every moment. xx
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