3 Steps To Achieving Your Dreams (Even When You’re Frozen In Fear)

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* More empowering words o’ wisdom for you today from gorgeous guest poster Jen of Wild Sister fame. 

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“Ultimately we know deeply that the other side of every fear is freedom.” ~ Mary Ferguson

Sometimes I feel like I’ve spent my entire life facing fears. It’s easy to feel that way when you’re recovering from anxiety.

Wow, I’ve never used the word ‘recovery’ referring to myself before. But it’s true.

I’ve come a helluva long way over the past few years, and it’s taken a ton of leaps, many heart-racing moments and countless slow, deep breaths, but I’m here.

Just a few years ago, I would experience full-blown panic attacks over something as simple as stepping outside of my front door.

I was terrified of doing anything on my own, and social situations would make me feel physically ill.

I felt so far a way from my dreams, it was heartbreaking.

Fast forward to now…

My husband and I are living overseas for the second time.

Last year, I flew across the country to attend a retreat with women I had never met before – all on my own.

I have achieved many of my biggest dreams, like running my own business, marrying my soulmate, travelling, and moving to Bali, just to name a few.

Now I’m on track to achieve brand new dreams, like becoming a philanthropist, see Europe and eventually start a family.

While I’ve accomplished a lot and completely changed my life in a seemingly short time, it took a lot of work. I really had to rebuild myself and my life, and I’m still not completely anxiety-free yet.

But I know I will be, if I just keep going.

There are still huge differences between who I am now and who I used to be. One being this; I don’t let fear stop me anymore.

I can see now that those fearful thoughts and feelings aren’t real, that I’m always safe, and that fear only has power if I give it power.

So, when it comes to making my dreams come true, I’m now a force to be reckoned with. I’m freaking unstoppable, baby! As someone who has had to face her biggest fears every single day, I’ve become an expert at it.

Here’s how I’ve learned to overcome fear to achieve my dreams…

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Breathe.

“Fear is excitement without the breath.” ~ Fritz Perls

Take a few deep breaths, relax your shoulders, and look around you. Centre yourself in the moment.

Fear only lives in our minds. By being present in the here and now, it cannot survive – because we are always safe.

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Let go.

“I have accepted fear as a part of life – specifically the fear of change. I have gone ahead despite the pounding in the heart that says: turn back.” ~ Erica Jong

You know that feeling you get in your gut when you think about your dream or goal? That pulling sensation that feels as though you’re literally being tugged towards your dream by an invisible rope?

Let it pull you.

Just let go and go with it.

Once you shift your perspective from your fears to your dreams, everything becomes so much clearer. Fear may be strong, but dreams are stronger.

Just keep your focus on your desires and let that fuel you for the next step.

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Jump.

“Inaction breeds doubt and fear. Action breeds confidence and courage. If you want to conquer fear, do not sit home and think about it. Go out and get busy.” ~ Dale Carnegie

This is the hardest, but most important, step. Sitting around thinking about what scares you is guaranteed to make it worse.

The sooner you take action and start moving, the quicker you’ll realise you had nothing to be afraid of in the first place.

So just do it. If you want your dream more than you’re afraid of it, put one foot in front of the other – and never ever stop – nothing will be able to stop you from achieving it.

Repeat these steps whenever you start to feel fear creeping up – and you will. The goal here isn’t to eliminate the fear; it’s to move forward no matter how afraid we are.

We all feel fear every now and then, especially when we’re chasing our dreams and changing the world.

What’s important is to walk with the fear, to keep going even though our legs are trembling and our heart is racing.

That’s how barriers are broken, challenges are overcome and lives are changed.

You can do it.

You’re unstoppable.

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Ready to take the next step? Leave a comment below and let us know what your next step is. Oh, and  if you have one to share, share your best tip for dealing with fear.

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Jen Saunders is the creator of Wild Sister Magazine and the Wild Sisterhood. She’s a tie-dye wearing daydream believer, writer and spirit junkie. Jen’s got so much love for women who own their power, smile at themselves and believe that happiness is a choice – so if that’s you, give her a wave at any one of her online homes so you can connect!

Facebook // Twitter 


Drop the Dream + Get Movin’!

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* As I get back on track this week after a month away, I’m rolling out more brilliant guest posts and this one is by my beautiful friend Tara from Such Different Skies. Show her some love in the comments!

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Not too long ago, I used to live my life with my attention constantly places three years ahead of me.

‘After I travel to South America, and snowboard in Switzerland, complete such-and-such certification and miraculously acquire some serious cash, THEN I’ll be ready for my dream career.’

What  was really going on though of course, was my ingrained belief that I infact did not deserve a deeply fulfilling life just yet.  But after a little more travel, a little more ‘life experience’, and few straight A’s, maybe, just maybe, I might be worthy.

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Do your dreams ever exhaust you?  If they do, I’m not surprised!  Big dreaming is a big transaction – of time, energy, attention and awareness. Don’t get me wrong, I simply wouldn’t be writing this post had I not spent some down and dirty time in Dream City, but there’s an enormous difference between visioneering, and the type of hardcore daydreaming that leaves you disconnected from your presence, frustrated at your current life situation and well, a little overwhelmed at what it’s going to take for you to ‘arrive’.

We can literally pysch ourselves out of the blissdom of moving toward an inspired life.  But know this: big dreams don’t always involve big leaps of faith, big risks and big life changes. What they do require, is persistence.

Small, consistent steps forward create quantum shifts in your reality; your energy field, your relationships, confidence and –  my favourite – your trust in life.  Think of every small right action as a billboard created for the Universe which says: ‘I am ready now.  And I need your help.’  (That last part is important, trust me.  You cannot do this alone.)

So, what could a small right action look like for you?

Depending on where you’re at in your journey, and of course, what that big dream of yours is, it could mean…

// Creating a new pinboard in Pinterest with the blogs/designers/women/etc that inspire you.  If you wanna up the potency, transfer those images to a wall in your house.  Hello, inspiration station!

// Setting up a Gravatar account, so we can see your beautiful face when you leave comments on our blogs.  If you’re commenting, you’re building your online presence – so let’s see them pearly whites!

// Choosing peppermint tea over coffee.

// Making the conscious decision to go to bed half an hour earlier.  Like I said, dreamin’ requires energy!  Sleep up, babe.

// Hiring a coach or visionary vixen that has a penchant for getting the wheels in motion.

// Attending events that both inspire and challenge you.

// Enrolling is a creative workshop, or an expressive movement class. Variety is the spice of life!

// Sitting down, and writing a list of what you do NOT want to feel, experience and talk about anymore.  This is important, and empowering.

All of this raises your consciousness and your confidence. Before you know it, you’ll be:

Wooing the big shots; launching your blog/business; booking a retreat for yourself to honour the creative space you need, and sharing your story with the world, allowing it to heal with you.

These are hugely symbolic actions to take which radiate your deepest desire. “I am willing to create change in my life.”

Don’t wait for your dream to come along and sweep you off your feet, sweet thing. Decide to bring it into your day.

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Do this now: Leave us a comment below and share what one right action you’re going to take in the direction of that dream of yours.

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Tara Bliss is a spirit-fueled coach and healer, motivational speaker, and creator of The Party Girls Guide to Peace. Her mission? To kick-start an avalanche of gutsy, fear-busting confidence and love (all with a side serve of swagger)! Think of her as your crystal-toting, skateboard-riding, raw-dessert-loving lumière, unveiling the path to peace and freedom. Her original medicine? Fierce and curious vulnerability. It’s time to embrace self-love. Seize adventure. Revel in unconventionality.

Connect with Tara atTara Bliss,Facebook, Twitter and Instagram (@tara_bliss).

Image: A House in the Hills